3/23/19

1. We were at a birthday party for our friend's daughter Katherine, in the lobby of the Detroit Opera House. There were three birthday cakes on a large table in the middle of the room that were being cut and served. I asked which one was the marzipan cake and was told it was a tiny one and was already gone The  guests demolished the remaining cakes and by the time I was served there were basically crumbs left, which were totally dried out and pretty flavorless. I kept getting coffee at the bar. I helped myself to a tap that I thought was coffee, but it shot out soda water, which sprayed all over the place. The coffee was in urns in another part of the lobby. I kept returning to the bar and repeating the same thing. My wife mentioned to me that I was endearing myself to another guest who was drinking a lot of coffee. At one point, Katherine's brother Steve came up to me and showed me his plate. He had a couple slices from the bottom of the cake and told me I should make a cake sandwich like he did.

2. I don't remember much about this one except there were tiny round stickers with numbers on them all around the city. They were part of a "hydrometer" system and if they weren't replaced, the whole city (world?) would blow up.

3. I was driving in Amy's car and an older man was walking down the sidewalk drinking a root beer. He took a big swig and spit it at the side of our car and then walked into a bank building. I asked Amy to pull over because I wanted to have words with him. The bank's door was locked and the manager wouldn't open the door all the way so I shouted to the guy to explain himself, He said he just spit the pop out without thinking. I told him I didn't appreciate it, and as I walked away from him, I gave him the finger by rubbing my eye with my middle finger. When I told Amy the guy was an asshole, she rushed me and pointed to the back seat there there were two little kids. One was in a car seat and another little girl was crawling around. I was a little concerned that she wasn't buckled in, but figured it was her business and didn't say anything.